The sun may have been shining and the pool was inviting, but yesterday afternoon belonged to me, my couch, the TV and the remote. Yes, my dears, yesterday afternoon I gave up the chance to gain a much needed tan and spent the afternoon in the house watching American Idol. I’ve waited months to be re-united with – my favourite – the brutally blunt Simon Cowell and his team. And after watching yesterday I’ve almost forgiven them for ousting Paula Abdul and her at times odd behavior.
The guest judges didn’t live up to much, indeed Victoria Beckham with her Barbie complexion offered nothing of great interest, while Mary J Blige spoke only a few words and looked decidedly bored. MJB did have one wonderful bout of laughter which brightened the mood and provided a great TV moment, but other than that she and Victoria should have stayed at home.
But the best part of course has to be the contestants, those thousands of wannabes who firmly believe they can sing, but in reality cannot. Why oh why so many of them think they can and put themselves up for such horrendous ridicule is beyond me. They must surely have been born tone-deaf, thick skinned, or live and socialize with nasty friends and family who lead them like lambs to the slaughter with encouraging yet false support.
The bulk of yesterday’s auditions were embarrassing and cringe worthy, and offered a fair balance of screechers, mumblers, shouters and even unforgivably the lyric forgetters. Some memorable characters for me were, the chap who’d almost lost his life 3 times and ended up having each of these instances dramatized into a very funny skit by AI producers, the girl dressed as a guitar, the ditsy girls, and of course the foul mouthed gent who assured everybody prior to his audition that he could deal with constructive criticism but in fact he couldn’t.
But perhaps the most entertaining was 69 year old General Larry Platt, the final contestant of the day. Here was a man well past his prime all set to debut his own song, namely Pants on the Ground. Well did he entertain me, and dare I say the judges as well, with even Simon suggesting Pants on the Ground could be a hit. General Larry sang and danced his way through this little ditty and even attempted the splits from which he miraculously recovered without missing a beat. And I loved how AI took this little song and got just about everybody left in the building to sing it as part of the final segment of the show. My betting is he’ll be on the final show, and well deserving to I might add.
My oh my, did I enjoy myself yesterday. Roll on next Sunday, American Idol you can’t come around soon enough…